Sunday, May 31, 2009
Truly, John Lennon was a great loss in the music industry. He totally changed the way people think and he radically pushed through for political activism which opened the doors for some changes in the US.
I know there are a lot of Filipino musician activists in the country today I just hope they continue what they are doing by bringing people together and fight for their causes as well as inspire others to do the same thru their songs..
Here's the video of "Give Peace a Chance".
Thursday, May 28, 2009
It was half-past when I arrived at the dorm. An old woman by the name of Mrs. Lopez, or “Mrs. Lupet” as what other dormers would call her welcomed me in the receiving area. By her looks I can sense already how strict she is. We went upstairs where the rooms are located. She showed me my room and went on telling me the house rules. Doors and gates of the building closed at . Lights out at . No drugs. No smoking. No drinking. No girls. No fighting with other dorm mates. She said whatever grudge we have with other dorm mates we should settle it outside. She asked me if I understood perfectly the house rules and if I have any other questions. I just gave her a nod.
I decided to lie on my bed for awhile and take a rest. Even if the travel time took a little less than the last time I went here in
Minutes passed by and my eyes began to give up. But even before I could really fall into slumber, I heard a knock at my door. “Oh, c’mon, the witch is here again”, I said to myself.
I opened the door, and it was not Mrs.Lopez. A guy by the name of Kiko stood in front of me. I thought he was from the other room and want to make friends. I told to go back in awhile if he wants to chat or get along and that I need to rest.
“Oh, didn’t Mrs. Lopez told you?, Kiko said.”
“Told me what?”, I answered.
Kiko told me that he was my room mate. I felt a little dumb for a minute or two. Why didn’t I think about that I have a room mate, when there are two beds in the room.
I said sorry to him and started a conversation. I noticed that he has an acoustic guitar with him. I asked another dumb question whether he plays. He answered me back with a simple yes. I continued with the conversation, but it felt a little awkward. So I decided to stop and told him that I need to sleep.
I woke up sweating. It was around 6PM says my watch. Kiko was not in his bed. Wondered where he is, but suddenly I heard someone singing and playing the guitar. Thought the sound is coming from the balcony. Yes, there was a small balcony in each room in the dorm. I thought Mrs. Lopez could not stop guys our age from smoking, and so in order for her patron students to come back and renew their contracts with her she placed a little balcony in each room. It has become sort of a silent attraction for the student-smokers like me.
I went to the balcony and there I saw Kiko. Heard him singing a song with these lyrics:
‘Cos if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me,
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I can be,
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet,
And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street.
I kept on thinking about the title, and there it popped out of my head, “The Man who can’t be moved” by The Script. How would I forget that!? It’s the song playing on the bus when I was on the road traveling to
He stood up and said I maybe hallucinating or that I am on heroine. He said I’m in no position to tell whether he is good or not. He walked through the room and into his bed. I thought, I’ve created another awkward scene.
I followed him. I asked him if he had dinner already. He answered me back with his simple yes. I asked him again if he has plans for the night and invited him to grab some beer after I had dinner. But he declined. He said he needs to sleep early for his class tomorrow. And so I went alone.
The following morning, I rushed to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Damn, I never thought living away from the house would be that hard. Yes, I won’t be hearing my mom yelling at me to fix my closet, but no one’s there to yell at me to wake up for my class. No one’s there to cook for me one decent meal.
As expected I went to class late. Luckily I wasn’t even called in the recitations and the professor was cool enough to forgive me for being late. He seemed to have deviated from the usual power-tripping and terrorizing professors out there.
I went home at around 6PM. Knocked at the door, but no one’s opening it. So I had to get my keys. All the while I thought Kiko’s still out. But I heard the sound of the guitar again coming from the balcony.
For the second time I sneaked in. I heard he’s singing a song with these lyrics:
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
I thought I’ve heard the song before. Kept thinking and thinking, until I figured it’s “How to save a life” by The Fray. I’ve heard it on the nearby restaurant where I had dinner, during my first night at the dorm.
His voice is so soothing. I felt like I’m listening to a new record. I decided not to interrupt him and continued to listen. I felt that the emotions are really flowing. I felt that the song was instrumental to what he is actually feeling right now.
After finishing the song, I hurriedly went to my room. I made it sure not to give him any clue that I am sneaking in. I thought he’d go to bed right away but he didn’t. I thought he’d play again but minutes gone by, all I heard was silence. I never knew what happened next. I fell asleep.
My life away from home became routinary. But I never expected that it would be this fun. I mean I get to meet new friends in school, get to enjoy some of my classes with cool professors and sometimes make out with women. Well, of course outside the dorm. But one thing that thrills me more is when I get to listen to Kiko. The way he plays his guitar and the way he sings his heart out is so moving. There’s a certain high that I feel when I get to listen to him. A certain high which marijuana or heroine could not even give to me. It felt like I’m playing the game of “Name that tune” or “Don’t forget the Lyrics” everytime I sneaked in at him.
I don’t know what is it with Kiko. I can’t explain how I could connect with his songs when I hardly get to start a conversation with him. I am not even sure if he’d open up for me when we get to start one.
I’ve been hearing a lot of gossips in school about Kiko. I’ve heard that one time in his Laboratory class, he didn’t have any partner to work with so he did an experiment by himself. It appears that he had really established a certain distance between himself and other people. I wondered how Kiko could live in total isolation. It’s like he has considered it as his way of life. I couldn’t think of anything that might give whatever enjoyment Kiko feels when he’s alone. Well, I do get to enjoy solitude once in awhile but I don’t think I can stand it more than twenty minutes.
One night, I tried to sneak in again at him. I heard he’s playing a song that seemed to be new to my ears. I listened intently to figure out the song. I heard that the lyrics were:
I was inviting, her into my heart
But she was out riding in some other man's car
She was my night time, thought I was her star
Guess I was wrong, but see I’m strong
Won’t take me long for me to move on
I tried to think where I heard the song, and it occured to me that the song was played in the frat party I attended. It’s “Go On Girl” by Neyo. I figured that his version was far different from the original that’s why I had a hard time thinking what the song is. His was an acoustic version. Turning an RnB into an acoustic soulful version was brilliant. That night I became a fan.
From that time on I religiously sneaked in at him. He continued to impress me with his renditions. Everytime I listen to him, I am relieved with whatever stress school is giving me.
It was the exams week. As I look my class standing, I need to get an A to pass Physics and a B+ to pass Calculus. Damn, I thought how am I supposed to get them when I can’t even stay up late to study.
I tried to drink a bottle of energy drink to stay awake for my exams the following morning. As I am about to start studying, I heard the strum of Kiko’s guitar. He’s playing again. I tried to ignore it but it’s just so inviting. I sneaked in him again. I thought a few minutes couldn’t hurt my Calculus and Physics.
The song’s a little bit weird right now. I’m not sure if I heard it on the radio or watched it on MTV. There’s some reggae feel to it but sounded more like alternative to me. I heard that the lyrics were:
So don't treat me like a puppet on a string
'Cause I know I have to do my thing.
Don't talk to me as if you think I'm dumb;
I wanna know when you're gonna come - soon.
What The Fuck! How could I not know the song. I just heard it the other night when I was hanging out with a girl I met in the bar. It’s from the legendary Bob Marley! It’s “Waiting in Vain.” Without noticing that time is passing by and ignoring the fact that I have to study for my exams the following morning, I stood right there and enjoyed the song.
I took the exams in Calculus at 8 in the morning and Physics at 3 in the afternoon. Good thing there was a break in between I got to review for Physics. The day was so stressful I thought I just want to go home and hit the sack.
But who could resist Kiko’s songs? Songs which are heroine for me. I sneaked in again at the balcony and started to listen. The strums of the guitar seemed a little bit slower. There’s a tone of sadness in his voice as he sings the lyrics of the song.
There is freedom within, there is freedom without
Try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
Theres a battle ahead, many battles are lost
But youll never see the end of the road
While you’re travelling with me
I didn’t have a hard time figuring out this song. From the first note, I know it is “Don’t Dream it’s Over” by Crowded House. A song which truly means a lot to me. It brings back a lot of memories. Memories which shattered me into pieces.
At that moment, my heart melted. My eyes went gloomy, and I felt that tears start to cloud my eyes. Kiko momentarily paused. I know he felt I was just right at his back. But he continued. He went on to finish the song and paused for a few seconds. He moved his head towards my direction. He then stood up and approached me. He tapped me on my shoulder and started to start to talk.
He started to open up. He started to be as bold as everyone else, not taking great care not to touch on certain things. He told me his story and I told him mine.
I learned a lot from him. Things which no one would ever think a guy his age would have been exposed to. Experiences which no one would ever imagine a guy as aloof as him would have encountered.
I didn’t notice that we are talking for hours. I can’t believe I engaged in such conversation. The melo-drama is so much a no-no for the type of guy in me. But Kiko and his songs let me burst out the emotions I’ve been keeping for quite a long time.
By the time we went out to our beds I can see the first ray of the sun beaming at us. I thanked him for his time. I thanked him for his songs. I thanked him for trusting me with his stories. He did the same. He told me how glad he is to have shared the night together as good friends.
The following morning, I was awaken by the knock of Mrs. Lopez on my door. I looked at Kiko’s bed but he wasn’t there anymore. His bed was fixed already. His closet was empty. I wondered where’d he go.
While scratching the corner of my left eye, I opened the door. Mrs. Lopez greeted me a good morning. I noticed that she was accompanied by a guy. Mrs. Lopez started to introduce me to the guy. His name was Francis.
I asked Mrs. Lopez where did Kiko go. Mrs. Lopez went on confused. She asked me who the hell I am talking about. I told her that Kiko was my roommate and that I was just with him last night. Mrs. Lopez told me that I might be dreaming or something. She even sounded suspicious that I might be taking pot in the dorm. She told me that all throughout the semester I don’t have a room mate. I was speechless. I didn’t even know what Mrs. Lopez is saying after telling me that. Her words seemed to have mixed up and do not make sense. I can hear her voice reverberate in the four corners of the room like it was coming from the ground. I almost fainted.
I sat down in my bed while Mrs. Lopez tours the guy and tells all the crappy house rules. I catch some air and drank water. I found myself laying flat on my bed. I looked at my watch and found out it’s already . God, I’ve fallen asleep again. Mrs. Lopez wasn’t in the room anymore. I thought I might have been asleep when she left and didn’t want to wake me.
I looked at the other bed in the room and it’s still fixed. Same as it was that morning. I stood up and went to the closet beside mine. I was about to open the closet but I heard a sound coming from the balcony. It was a strum of a guitar, I thought. I walked my way to the balcony to find out who’s making the sound. It was Francis.
* TIRED OF CAMPAIGNING.. So Back to blogging muna.. :)
Friday, May 22, 2009
LOCATION: Sa Sementeryo
Apo 1: Hay naku, Good Luck naman sa matandang to kung may maka-miss sa kanya?
Apo 2: Ang tagal naman matapos nito gutom na ko!
Apo 3: Naku, ano kaya pinamana sa'kin ni Lolo?
Apo 4: Hay naku, mabuti na nga sa matandang yan, nang matahimik na tong bahay na to at wala ng pabigat sa'tin.
Apo 5: Siguro tama na nga na nabawian na sya ng buhay, isa lang naman ang paborito nya sa mga apo niya eh.
Apo 6: Wow, sino kaya yung sexy na yun!?
Apo 7: Hay naku dapat natutulog pa ko!
Sepulturero[Extra]: Ok na po ba? Pwede ko na bang ibaon ang Lolo niyo?
Lahat ng APO: Oo bilisan mo! Scene 2 na!
Lolo: Aba, eh nasan ba ko?! Baket parang sobrang init dito? Hanggang dito ba naman ramdam ang Global Warming.
SANTI: Wahahahaha!! Lolo!! Mabuti naman at nakarating ka ng safe and sound!
Lolo: (Sino naman tong hinayupak na tong naka-costume pa!?) Ah eh! hu u?
SANTI: Wahahahaha!! Pasensya na Lolo!, we haven't formally introduced, Call me Santi!
Lolo: (Aba pilingero tong mamang to! Feeling nya siya yung bata sa 'May Bukas Pa!') Ok Mama! Nice to meet you! Ano bang lugar to? Wag mong sabihing nasa.. .. ..
SANTI: Tama ka Lolo!! Say it! Say it!
Lolo: OH!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SANTI: OH!! YES!!!!!!!!!, Welcome to HELL Lolo!!
SANTI: Ngayon lolo, ikaw ay sasailalim sa isang orientation. Importanteng malaman mo kung bakit ka nandito ngayon at ang mga obligasyon mo sa AKIN!
Lolo: (Power Trip tong hinayupak na to ah!) Anong Obligasyon ko Sayo!? May utang ba ko sayo?
SANTI: Utang na Loob, Lolo! Yan ang dapat mong bayaran Lolo! At madaragdagan pa yan sa mga darating na panahon.
Lolo: At bakit naman ako nagkaroon ng Utang na Loob sayo aber?!
SANTI: Syempre Lolo! Ako lang ang tumanggap saiyo!! Alam mo bang ayaw ng mga taga dun sa Taas na makarating doon kahit hibla ng buhok mo?! You should be Thankful to me Lolo!
Lolo: Orayt! Sige go straight to the point anung kailangang kong gawin para matahimik kang hinayupak ka?
SANTI: Wahahaha!!! Cool lang lolo!!
Lolo: Leche! Pano ako magiging cool eh ang init init dito, tignan mo nga nagkalat yang nagliliyab na apoy dito!
SANTI: Lolo! Ikaw naman, That's the IRONY of Hell Lolo! Kahit na mainit dito, Cool pa din ang mga tao!
Lolo: (Hay masasapak ko na to!)
SANTI: Orayt Lolo!, base sa aking records ay hindi pa naman ikaw ang pinaka-masamang tao sa Mundo. At dahil dyan MANANATILI ka pa din dito! Wahahahahahaha!!
Lolo: Anak ng Tipaklong! Ayoko dito! Ang init nga at ang papanget niyo! Hindi ako nagpayaman sa mundo para lang mapunta dito.
SANTI: Wahahaha!!! Wala ka ng magagawa Lolo Hawak ko na ang kaluluwa mo! Wahahaha!
Lolo: Wala na bang ibang paraan SANTI! Babayaran kita kahit magkano!?
SANTI: Wahahaha!!! Wala akong pakialam sa salapi mo Lolo!, Gusto ko lang ang Kaluluwa mo haha!!
Lolo: OMG! I'm Doomed!!
SANTI: Orayt Lolo! Pagbibigyan kita! Gusto mo bang bumalik sa Lupa??
Lolo: Oo naman! Anong gagawin ko? Kahit ano? Makabalik lang ako sa Lupa!
SANTI: Sure ka na ba dyan Lolo?
Lolo: Oo SURE NA! SURE NA SURE!!
SANTI: Madali lang Lolo!! Alam mo ba ang 'SEVEN DEADLY SINS'?
Lolo: Oo! Whatabout?
SANTI: Kailangang sa loob ng 24 Oras makahanap ka ng isang tao na makakagawa ng lahat ng 'SEVEN DEADLY SINS'
Lolo: Huh! Ang hirap naman! Bakit 24 Oras lang!?
SANTI: Lolo, dahil katulad ng Balita, hindi natutulog ang demonyo!! wahahahaha!!
Lolo: Okay sige! Call!!
SCENE 5: PRIDE
Nagsimula sa kanyang misyon si Lolo. Nilakad niya ang kahabaan ng kalye para maghanap ng mapapagawa ng isa sa mga deadly sins. Makalipas ang 5 oras nakita niya si Apo 1.
Lolo: Apo 1! Apo 1! Halika dito!
Apo 1: Sino po sila?
Lolo: Hindi mo ba ako nakikilala?
Apo 1: Hindi po eh. Sino po ba kayo?
Lolo: Ako ang Lolo mo.
Apo 1: Huh!? Patay na po ang Lolo ko! Nakakalungkot nga eh, kasi isang taon kaming hindi naguusap bago siya binawian ng buhay. Ewan ko, walang maglakas-loob saming dalawa na magsimula. Walang gustong kalimutan panandalian kung ano mang sakit yung binigay namin sa isa't-isa. Paano po, pasensya na napakwento pa ako sainyo, iwan ko na muna kayo.
Napa-buntung-hininga si Lolo sa narinig. Pinilit niyang tawagin si Apo 1 ngunit bahagyang nakalayo na ito.
Sa muling paglalakad ni Lolo napadpad siya sa isang karinderya. Lumabas ang isang binata, si Apo 2.
Lolo: Apo 2! Apo 2!
Apo 2: Ako ho ba tinatawag niyo?
Lolo: Oo Apo! hindi mo ba nakikilala ang Lolo mo?
Apo 2: Ho? Patay na po ang Lolo ko. Medyo depressed nga po ako eh. Di ako makakain ng ayos. Nakokonsensya nga po ako kasi, noong mga panahong may sakit siya, yung mga pagkaing dala ng mga kamag-anak namin tinatago ko at ako lang ang kumakain. Pero pinagsisihan ko na yun, kaya nga on diet na ko ngayon eh. Ay, lolo pasensya na po, napakwento nako, una na po ako sainyo.
Lolo: Apo 2 saglit lang!!
Napabuntung-hininga si Lolo for the 2nd time. Pilit nyang tinawag si Apo 2 ngunit nakalayo na ito.
Tumingin si Lolo sa kanyang relo, napansin niyang lumipas na pala ang apat na oras ngunit wala pa din siyang nakikitang gagawa ng kahit isa man sa mga deadly sins ni SANTI.
Napadpad siya sa isang casino. Sa may lobby nakita niya si Apo 3.
Lolo: Apo 3! Apo 3!
Apo 3: Ako ho ba ang tinatawag niyo?
Lolo: Oo Apo 3!
Apo 3: Teka po, nagkakamali po yata kayo. Hindi nyo po ako apo. Patay na po ang Lolo ko. Sa totoo nga po, namimiss ko siya eh. Madalas kasi kami dito sa casino dati. Naalala ko nga, kinukupitan ko siya ng pera para lang makapag-sugal ako. Minsan yung ipinapapaabot niyang baon sa kapatid ko pinangsusugal ko na din. Siguro lahat na ata ng sugal kahit yung wrestling ng gagamba tinatayaan ko eh. Pasensya na lolo, kailangangan ko ng pumasok sa loob, baka pagalitan ako ng boss ko.
Lolo: Teka lang Apo 3!, nagtatrabaho ka dito?
Apo 3: Oho! Natanggap akong manager kahapon lang!
Napabuntung-hininga si Lolo for the 3rd time. Napangiti nang malamang ang dati niyang apong halos sugal ang inatupag sa buhay ay unti-unting nagbabago.
Lolo: (Pagkakataon ko na ito!!)
Nilapitan ni Lolo ang dalawang lalaki. Ngunit bago pa man siya makalapit ay lumitaw bigla si Apo 4 para awatin ang dalawang lalaki.
Lolo: Apo 4!?
Apo 4: Ako ho ba tinatawag niyo?
Lolo: Oo Apo 4, ako to ang lolo mo? Hindi mo ba ako naalala?
Apo 4: Mukhang nagkakamali ho kayo Lolo! Patay na po ang lolo ko. Kaka-miss nga siya eh, kahit na madalas nagtatanim ako ng galit sa kanya pag hinahampas niya ako ng sinturon niya. Ang sakit naman kasi eh. Pero ngayon ko lang nalaman kung bakit niya ginagawa yun, sayang wala na siya. Haay, Lolo una nako sainyo at kailangan ko pang pag-batiin yung dalawang lalaking nakita niyo kanina..
Napabuntung-hininga na naman ang matanda, for the 4th time. Magkahalong tuwa at lungkot ang naramdaman ng matanda. Hindi niya akalaing nagtanim pala ng galit si Apo 4 sa kanya nung nabubuhay pa siya. Naisip niyang kung mabibigyan lang siya muli ng pagkakataon ay masasabi niya ang kanyang mga nadarama.
Muling tumingin sa kanyang relo si Lolo. Napansin niyang nakaka-12 oras na siya sa paghahanap ng mabibiktima, ngunit wala pa din siyang makita. Napadaan siya sa isang sari-sari store. Napansin niyang may TV sa loob. Naisip ni lolong tumambay panandalian. 'Tayong Dalawa' ang palabas. Sarap na sarap si Lolo sa panood, hanggang sa...
Apo 5: Hay, naku Aling Nena, yan na naman pinapanood niyo replay na kaya yan, magaaway dyan si Gerald at Jake kasi pinagseselosan nila si Kim. Pabili ngang softdrinks!
Lolo: Apo 5!?
Apo 5: Ho? Ako ba kausap niyo?
Lolo: Oo! Lolo mo to? Di mo ba ko nakikilala?
Apo 5: Patay na ho Lolo ko. Ka-miss din yung matandang yun minsan eh. Kahit alam kong favorite nya yung isa kong kapatid. Pero okay na sakin yun kahit sino pang favorite niya kahit papaano di din naman siya nakakalimot bigyan ako ng aginaldo pag pasko.
Aling NENA[Extra]: Oh ito na softdrinks mo!!
Apo 5: Sige Aling Nena Salamat. Sige ho, una na din ako sa inyo manong.
Napabuntung-hininga na naman si Lolo sa ikalimang pagkakataon. Hindi maipinta ang tuwa ni Lolo sa narinig. Parang habang dumadaan ang oras gumagaan ang kanyang pakiramdam.
Makalipas ang 15 oras, wala pa ding kapaguran si Lolong naghahanap ng mabibiktima, ngunit mukhang minamalas ang matanda. Napadpad si Lolo sa isang bangketa. Nakita niya ang isang tumpok ng mga taong mukhang may pinagkakaguluhan. Gusto mang maki-usyoso ni lolo ngunit sa edad niya ay di niya magawa. Hanggang may nakita siyang isang binatilyo at tinanong kung ano ang dahilan ng kaguluhan. Hindi niya namalayang si Apo 6 pala ang binatilyong ito.
Lolo: Iho!? Ano ba yang kaguluhan na iyan?
Apo 6: Ah eh, pinagkakaguluhan po kasi yung video scandal ni Dr. Hayden Kho at Katrina Halili eh.
Lolo: Ah ganun ba!!
Apo 6: Oho, mauna na ko sainyo.
Lolo: Teka, Apo 6 ikaw ba yan? Oo ikaw nga yan apo ko!
Apo 6: Ho? Patay na ho ang lolo ko. Saka ang layo niyo po sa kanya eh, kasi kahit matanda na yon japorms pa din yun eh. Dun nga ako natutong magpa-pogi eh para madami lumapit saking chicks. Pero nung namatay siya, stick to one na lang ako, wala ng taga-bigay sakin ng pang-date eh. Saka ngayon ko lang din na-realize na mas masarap pala yung feeling pag stick to one ka.
Sa ikaanim na pagkakataon napabuntung-hininga muli si Lolo. Walang nasabi sa narinig. Hindi niya akalaing iniidolo pala siya ni Apo 6. At lalong hindi siya makapaniwalang ang chickboy na apo niyang si Apo 6 ay magiging one-woman-man.
Nakakaramdam na ng pagod at antok si Lolo. Ikaw ba naman and maglakad buong hapon at magdamag? Sige nga! Halos magbebente-kwatro oras na at wala pa din siyang makita na mabibiktima kahit isa. Napad-pad siya sa park. Nakakita ng bench at doon umupo. Tumingin muli si Lolo sa kanyang relo, alas-5 na ng umaga, isang oras na lang at malapit ng matapos ang itinakdang oras.
Papikit na ang mata ni Lolo nang, may marinig siyang paparating. Alam mo na siyempre kung sino yun!! Si Apo 7! Suot ang kanyang jogging pants at sweat shirt, pawis na pawis na lumapit sa kinauupuan ng matanda si Apo 7.
Apo 7: Ok ba kayo dyan manong? Aga niyo ah, madalas ako nauuna dito sa park mag-jogging ah!
Lolo: Apo?! Ang lolo mo to?
Apo 7: Apo?! Lolo? Patay na ho ang lolo ko! Sana nga nabubuhay pa siya ngayon para makita niya na hindi na ko tanghali magising at madalas na ko magexercise. Haay!! Siguro kung buhay pa siya kasama ko siya ngayong nagjojogging! Oh paano Manong!, una na ko, nakaka-isang ikot pa lang ako eh!
(Alam mo na!) Napabuntung-hininga muli si Lolo. Hindi na alam ang kanyang nararamdaman.
SANTI: Wahahahaha!!! Wahahahaha!!
Lolo: Haayz.. Andito na naman ako!!, makikita ko na naman ang hinyupak.
SANTI: Wat up?! Lolo! Anong balita?
Lolo: Eto, wala akong nabiktima, ang hirap naman ng pinaggawa mo sakin eh!
SANTI:Kung alam mo lang lolo, kitang-kita ko ang lahat ng mga pinaggagawa mo pagbalik mo sa lupa. Nakakasuka! Ang emo mo masyado! May pabuntung-hininga ka pang nalalaman.
Lolo: Wapakels! Ano bang problema mo! Eh sa natutuwa akong nakita ko muli ang mga apo ko eh! Ang sarap ng pakiramdam na pinapahalagahan ako ng aking mga apo!
SANTI: Hay naku Lolo! Stop it na! Masyado ka atang nanonood ng telenovela! Ang drama mo masyado!
Lolo: Wala lang nagmamahal sa'iyo! You're such a LOSER!
SANTI: Hay! Whatever!!
Lolo: Oh ano na? Ano bang verdict mo sakin?
SANTI: Handa ka na ba Lolo?
SANTI: Wahahaha! Kung gayon!, Dim the lights please!
Lolo: (Pilingero ampucha!, Nagpaka-Ryan Seacrest pa ata!)
SANTI: 'HELL' voted and Lolo!, I'm sorry but you are Going 'Home' tonight!!
Biglang lumakas ang hangin. Nabalot ng liwanag ang dilim. Ang apoy na nagliliyab ay napalitan ng mga puti at makakapal na ulap. Ang amoy ng abo ay napalitan ng halimuyak ng mga bulaklak. Ang halakhak ni SANTI ay napalitan ng mga awiting sinasaliwan ng trumpeta.
Hindi alam ni Lolo ang kanyang nararamdaman.. Para bang nanumbalik ang dating sigla ng kanyang katawan. Para bang walang nagbago. Para bang nagbalik siya sa kanilang tahanan at kapiling ang mga apo.
Hanggang sa... Napabuntung-hininga na lang ang Lolo mo!!
Monday, May 18, 2009
And the result: Independent Thinker(IT)
Independent Thinkers are specialists in their area. The development of their ideas and visions is important to them; they love being as flexible as possible and, ideally, of being able to work alone because they often find it a strain having to make their complex trains of thought understandable to other people. Independent Thinkers cannot stand routine. Once they consider an idea to be good it is difficult to make them give it up; they pursue the implementation of that idea obstinately and persistently, also in the face of external opposition.
Independent Thinkers are not the type who easily comes out of his shell. Speaking about their emotional life is also not one of their strong points. Anyway, social relationships are not particularly important to them; they are happy with just a few, close friends who find it easy to share their intellectual world. They find it difficult to establish new ties. In love, they need a lot of space and independence but this does not mean that their partner is not important to them. Independent Thinkers often make a cool and reserved impression on others; but this impression is deceptive: they can hardly bear it if people close to them should reject them. They prefer a harmonious, balanced relationship with a partner who shares their interests and with whom they can realise their visions.
* Thanks to Ken for sharing the personality test.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
From the time we became aware of the world around us, we tend to be inquisitive. From our toddler years we get to ask a lot of questions which some of them are answered by our parents fit to the level of mental development we have.
Lately I’ve been asking a lot of questions. Questions which by now I should have been certain what the answer is, but for some reason or another I just can’t figure out the puzzle.
Maybe I’ve been thinking too much. Maybe I’m not. Maybe there really is no answer to my queries.
There are some questions that are capable of a straightforward answer. There are questions which need some research or study to be answerable. But there are some questions which cannot be answered by google.
History itself makes us wonder why or why not a certain event did or did not happen. Some of the mysteries of life have yet to be unraveled. Certain cases and issues in the past are yet to be closed because either people are apathetic or they just easily forget. Or maybe they have come to realized that it isn't really capable of being answered.
Maybe some of the questions in our mind our really unanswerable. Or maybe it is, we are just afraid to face the truth. The truth which would open our eyes to the realities we always try to hide even if it’s right in front of us.
Ever encountered the term subconscious? Ever thought how powerful our subconscious is? Sometimes we experience an unexplainable pressure inside us. Pressures which make us do some involuntary behaviors. Behaviors which we sometimes cannot explain why we are doing it. What we just know is that we are supposed to do it.
We all carry a certain amount of weight which we don’t recognize sometimes. Be it heavy or light we can’t seem to unload the weight in our shoulders. These loads tend to act as forces which make us do the things we do. Things we hate to admit. Things which cover up the underlying issues in our lives we just don’t want to confront.
We always want to fix everything around us, even ourselves. We always look for solutions. We always look for answers. But have we ever thought that none of us really know what we’re doing.
Maybe we should stop living our lives looking for answers. Why don’t we focus on the questions? Why don’t we take time to read between the lines? Maybe just by doing that we’d come to a realization that ‘the question is the answer’
Alright, I guess most of you guys have watched the film already and you know who the characters and the plot of the story is, because I don’t intend to make a review here. But for those who haven’t watched the film, it’s all about a dog which two married couples bought which they named Marley. They had Marley right before they get their own child, basically to learn how to handle the responsibility of taking care of a child.
So I think you got a quick look of the story already. For a more in depth review click here.
Now, I’d like to go on with the purpose of this entry. I’d like to talk about our pet animals. I guess everyone of us have experienced having a pet. From the domesticated ones, like dogs, cats or rabbits to the undomesticated and untamed creatures like snakes, tigers, iguanas and others.
More often than not we give them pet names. Some wanted it unique and some settle for a common blacky, browny, whitey, pinky. etc. depending on their body color.
Usually we became pet owners from the time the animal is still young, sometimes just about the time they were born. From then on we feed them, play with them, and cuddle them. A bond is created. We became emotionally attached with the animal as if he is our best friend, a son, or daughter, brother or a sister, one who is truly a part of the family. That’s why when the time comes that our pet needs to leave us it’s disheartening.
Being a good companion when you’re sad. A confidante when there’s no one there to turn to. When a girl you really dig dumped you, your pet is there to cuddle you. When you feel like strolling around, your pet is there to jog or walk with you.
Your pet isn’t there as a toy. You don’t even own it just because you paid for him. Your pet is your responsibility once you have ‘adopted’ him. In return for the good things you have been giving him, he’s there to accompany you mostly in times when you needed someone. You don’t even have to ask. He knows when you need him. And he’ll be there as always, even if you don’t even need him, because the pet values you as much as you value him.
The life of a pet animal is relatively shorter than ours. But despite the short span of their existence, I think if only they could talk, they’d be more than thankful for making their life more valuable than any living animal in this world. More than thankful that you have treated him like any other human being.
I’ll leave you with John Grogan’s words at the end of the movie, “A dog don’t care if you’re rich or poor, clever, dull, smart or dumb. Give him your heart and he’ll give him yours.”
*To my dog Leone this post is for you, I know you are happy wherever you are now..
Friday, May 15, 2009
Birthday Party ni Nina.
Nagkaroon ng isang munting salo-salo. Doon sa Laguna.
May bandang tumutugtog. Si Shelley yung kauna-unahang na-link sakin ang vocalista.
Nakasuot sila ng damit na camouflage. Para tuloy silang bandido.
Di ko agad nakilala si Shelley kasi parang kamukha niya si Jeff yung kaklase ko nung 4th year highschool.
Pero akalain mo, andun din si Jeff sa audience, nanonood. Kumaway ako kay Jeff. Pinilit mangamusta kahit na magsigawan kami dahil sa sampung tao ang pagitan namin.
Tuloy ang jamming sa banda.
Tapos nagvideoke kami, pero di ako makapili ng kanta kahit naghanda ako ng mga kakantahin bago dumating doon. Nilista ko pa nga sa cellphone ko eh.
Nainis na sakin si Nina, kasi ayaw kong bitiwan yung microphone.
Hanggang sa kinuha na lang niya sa akin at nagpatugtog siya ng radyo.
Hinayaan ko nalang siya. Nakuha ang atensyon ko ng isang malaking ensaymada sa gitna ng stage. Kumurot ako at kumain.
Nakita ako ng mga taong sarap na sarap. Hanggang yung mga tao nakikurot na din sa ensaymada.
Pagkakataon ko na to. Walang may hawak ng microphone. Pumindot na lang ako bigla at kinanta kung ano man ang lumabas. Anak ng tipaklong, "Bikining Itim". Sige ayos na yan, kesa naman "Modelong Charing" ni blakdyak!
Mukhang badtrip na si Nina. Mukhang sinisira ko ang party niya. Kinuha niya ulit sa kin ang mic.
Hinanap ko si Jeff sa audience. Wala na siya.
Hinanap ko si Shelley pero, biglang nawala na din yung banda.
Narinig ko nalang na may videoke bar sa tapat.
Andun din pala yung iba naming kaklase. Nagiinom at nakakantahan.
Sa loob ng ilang minutong pagkakatitig ko sa direksyon ng videoke bar, may dumating na magkakabarkada. Kung di ako nagkakamali 4 sila. 3 Babae, at isang sirena. Dalawa sa babae ay naka-pulang damit at may suot na SANTA Hat. Nagsimula silang kumanta. Kakaiba silang kumanta, may ubo-ubo pang kasama.
Naisipan kong umalis.
Naglakad ako kahit alam kong magmumukha akong basang sisiw dahil sa lakas ng ulan.
Napansin kong nakatingin si Lemuel sa akin. Pero hindi niya na ko hinabol. Tuloy siya sa pagkain ng ensaymada.
Tinawagan ko si Madj na nag-boboard malapit sa lugar na iyon. Nagkausap kami, pero biglang naputol ang linya.
Nagdesisyon akong umuwi nalang.
Nang matunton ko ang service road, napansin kong walang katao-tao. May nakita akong tricycle. Pinara ko. Nagulat ako na isa lang ang mata ng driver. Hindi ako sumakay. Ayokong isiksik yung sarili ko sa loob ng tricyle na may isang makinang hindi ako sigurado kung para saan. Ngunit isa lang ang pumasok sa isipan ko, at ito ang pelikulang "CHAINSAW TEXAS MASSACRE".
Tumawid ako ng kalsada. Nahirapan ako dahil sobrang dilim. Hindi ko minsan makita kung may mga sasakyan bang parating.
Natigil ako sa gitna ng kalsada, nang isang malaking van ang bumisina sa akin ng sobrang lakas. Para akong istatwa ni Rizal sa gitna. Hindi ko na alam ang nangyayari sa paligid ko.
Napalingon ako at nakita kong nagsala-salabat ang mga sasakyan. Wasak na wasak ang harap at likod ng mga kotse. Basag ang mga salamin. Umuungol ang mga taong sakay nito.
Hanggang sa tumigil ang malaking van sa harap ko. Bumaba ang limang taong, walang mukha. Hinawakan nila ako sa aking dalawang kamay at isinakay sa loob ng van. Hindi nako nakapalag pa.
* Ang labo ng istorya no?! Bangungot kasi eh.. hehe!!!
I went to St. Luke’s Hospital yesterday to visit a friend who had his brain tumor operation. Good news the operation was successful. But my friend would just have to bear the big stitches and staples in his head. I even joked at him that he’s no different than Frankenstein now, only without the screws.
While walking around the hospital I passed by the Intensive Care Unit or the ICU as commonly termed. I can’t seem to imagine the pressure of the people inside as the life of another is in their hands. A teary-eyed woman walked in front of me. I felt the grief inside her. I saw some fear in her eyes. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the agony brought about by the operation which seemed to take a lifetime.
I continued walking around. I saw a person in a hospital bed being transferred to another room. I overheard two people in disagreement about the fate of their loved one who is comatose. I wondered why they are arguing. A lot of thoughts come in my mind. Maybe they’re having difficulty paying the bills or buying the medicines. Maybe they just want to give up and just remove their loved one from the hospital and just cherish the remaining time he has at their home. I saw the patient’s eyes. He seemed aware of what’s happening around him. As if he wants to tell something. As if he wants to tell it’s time for him to leave. If only he could talk and say to them what he really wants then everything would fall in place and all are at peace.
When I see a person in coma a dead corpse just kept on running in my head. I wonder how the nurses or doctors out there have managed to keep up with their jobs when almost everyday of their lives they see a dead person.
A person in coma as they say is almost as good as dead. Without the machine which gives him oxygen, he dies. There’s practically no body movement. The normal functions of his system is not operating. No emotions. No feelings. No interaction. We hardly get any response from whatever we would want to tell him.
In medicine, Comatose is a profound state of unconsciousness. A comatose person cannot be awakened, fails to respond normally to pain or light, does not have sleep-wake cycles, and does not take voluntary actions.
It’s common for a person who has been in a tragic accident, say a car wreck or a victim of frustrated murder or homicide, or someone who overdosed drugs, to be in a coma. Medically speaking, the shock experienced by their body during the event caused them to be unconscious and their system disrupted. As I’ve said, practically they don’t have a life to speak of at the very moment they’re in a coma.
I have this person in mind whose life seems to have eaten him so much. He wakes up at . He sleeps at dawn. He hardly eats the right meal. He just sits in his couch all day. And the cycle goes on and on. I asked him in a half-jokingly manner, “Why don’t you get a life man!?
Well maybe I was right when I said that to him. Maybe he should really take it seriously. If a person in coma is almost as good as dead. I can consider him as good as a person in coma.
I just wonder how a person like him could stand the way he is living his life. I’ve always believed that we all have goals in life. No matter how small or silly it is. But for someone like him who has lived his life in the four corners of his home without working his ass off, he only needs a hospital bed and a machine that could sustain his life, and his technically in coma.
A friend of a friend told me that there was this girl who hardly talks to everyone. She always walks with his head leaning towards the floor. She prevents herself from getting an eye-contact with anyone. Rumor has it that she was abused as a child after her parents got separated and she lived from one relative to another.
I pity her for being imprisoned of the pain and sorrows she is going through. I sympathize with her for all the scars she has to hide. Scars of the past which cannot anymore be corrected. Scars which made her choose to be numb. Numbness which took away her precious life at a young age. Numbness which made her no less than a person in coma.
No person would want to be in a coma. Whether it be the literal and medically accepted concept of comatose or otherwise. It’s unbearable that one’s life is shut down instantly by some tragic event. Given the medical technology we have today, it’s not anymore impossible to give a person in coma a second stake at life.
But unlike a person who’s technically in coma, a person, figuratively speaking, who’s life is in coma has only one hope of survival. Everything lies in his own hands. No medical intervention would save him from the condition he’s into. The treatment is yet to be known unless the person burdened by it takes some steps to go on with his life.
Moving on with life after you’ve fallen into pieces is not easy, but by being angry with the world would shatter you more. Remember that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Use all the sufferings you’ve experienced as you make yourself invincible.
As I always say “this life is just too good to pass up”. So STAY ALIVE!
* While driving home, saw a sign on a sidewalk in España, the sign says:
"PUTA KA!, BAWAL UMIHI DITO!"
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Waking up everyday, feeling so empty and caught up by emotions of yesterday just adds up to the irritation caused by the changing weather and the fact that I'm broke. I chose to be apathetic with all the problems that I have to face, but they just keep on lingering. It sickens me.
I thought I'd need to breathe, but breathing itself seems to get harder and harder everyday. The pre-conceived notion that a guy my age should have been on his way to the corporate ladder or better yet earning big bucks already makes me want to just leave the house and get on my feet.
I've been writing a lot of inspiring and motivating entries here, as if proclaiming I have all the authority to do so. I don't even know why I have written those entries in the first place, when in fact my life is as close to becoming miserable in just one push of a button.
Maybe I still haven't found what I'm looking for. Or maybe I don't really know what it is I am looking for. All my life, I've been competitive and determined to get what I want. But as of this moment, I feel like living the life I chose seemed to get more and more complicated every waking hour.
It's always my principle in life that when you start something you've got to finish it. I've never been a quitter. I don't even want to be called one, it pisses me off. But what if quitting is the only way to move on with your life. What if what you've started should have never been started at all.
The problem with quitting is it's not a walk in the park. Quitting entails a lot of guts and a huge amount of courage to swallow your pride and ego. Quitting is even harder if there are people involved, especially your family.
Most of us Filipinos are family-oriented. Our parents always support us with our studies all throughout College and some even with their post-graduate studies. Unlike the Caucasians who at a certain young age live independently from their parents. There are the pros and cons of living independently but I come to think that what if we are raised that way. I wonder if I'd still feel all the uncertainties I have right now. Maybe, just maybe, being alone I'd be able to make up my own decisions without even thinking about what my parents would have to say.
For almost 2 months now, I haven't communicated with the people in school. I really had a partial hiatus with my friendster, multiply and facebook accounts. I felt opening up a conversation with them would just make it difficult for me to get the breather I need. Don't get me wrong, I do miss them, especially that someone, but I thought I have to do this.
Mood swings have been a common problem with my personality. Maybe if ever I do get a check-up from a specialist I think I'd even be diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. Sometimes I just wake up and feel I hate the world and don't want to talk. Now, how insane is that?
Haay.. Blogging is the only thing I can think of that keeps me sane. Thanks Blogger!
Tangnaloob! tan-tanan mo nakong Mood Swings ka!!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Here are some of the videos I like and made the most impact on me.
"Word of the Lourd" airs on TV5's Top Ten every Mondays at 11:00PM.
Monday, May 11, 2009
A friend of mine posted this 'BRO CODE' by Barnabus "Barney" Stinson of How I met your Mother on his facebook, thought I'd share this with you guys. Barney made some sense here, though I know some articles would cause quite a stir to others. Haha!! Enjoy reading!!
Article 1: Bro's before Ho's
Article 2: A Bro is always entitled to do something stupid, as long as the rest of his Bros are doing it
Article 3: If a Bro gets a dog, it must be at least as tall as his knee when full-grown
Article 4: A Bro never divulges the of the Bro Code to a woman. It is a scared document not to be shared with chicks for any reason...no not even that reason.
NOTE: If you are a woman reading this, first let me apologise: it was never my intention for this book to contain so much math. Second, I urge you to look at this document for what it is-apeice of fiction meant to entertain a broad audience through the prism of stereotypical gender differences. I mean, sometimes it really is like we're from different planets! Clearly, no real person would actually beleive or adhere to the vulgar rules contained within.* Those boots are adorable, b-t-dub.
*Psst-her guys I put this in really small type at the bottom since we all know men have much better vision than women. Ignore the above-the Bro Code is definitely NOT a peice of fiction. I was simply lying to uphold this very article.
Article 5: whether he cares about sports or not, a Bro cares about sports.
Article 6: A /bro shall not lollygag if he must get naked in front of other Nros in a gym locker room
Article 7: A Bro never admits he can't drive stick. Even after an accident.
Article 8: A Bro never sends a greeting card to another Bro.
Article 9: Should a Bro lose a body part due to an accident or illness, his fellow Bros will not make lame jokes such as "Gimmee three!" or "Wow, quiiting your job like that really took a lot of ball". Its still a high five and that Bro still has a lot of balls...metaphorically speaking of course.
Article 10: A Bro will drop whatever he's doing and rush to help his Bro dump a chick.
Article 11: A Bro may ask his Bro(s) to help him move, but only after first discoling an honest estimate on both time commitment and number of large pieces of furnititure. If the Bro has vastly underestimated either, his Bros retain the right to leave his possessions where they are-in most cases, stuck in a doorway.
Article 12: Bros do no share dessert
Article 13: All Bros shall dub one of their Bros his wingman
Article 14: If a chick inquires about another Bro's sexual history, a Bro shall honor the 'Brode of silence' and play dumb. Better to have women think all men are stupid than tell the truth.
Article 15: A Bro never dances with his hands above his head.
Article 16: A Bro should be able, at any time, to recite the following reigning champions: Super Bowl, World Series, and Playmate of the Year
Article 17: A Bro shall be kind and courteous to his co-workers, unless they are beneath him on the Pyramid of Screaming
Article 18: If a Bro spearheads a beer run at a party, he is entitled to any excess monies accrued after canvassing the group
Article 19: A Bro shall not sleep with another Bro's sister. However, a Bro shall not get angry if another Bro says, "Dude, your sisters hot!"
Article 20: A Bro respects his Bros in the m,ilitary because they've selflessly chosen to defend the nation, but more to the point, because they can kick his ass sex ways to sunday.
Article 21: A Bro never shares observations about another Bro's smoking-hot girlfriend. Even if the Bro with the hot girlfriend attempts to bait the Bro by saying "she's smoking-hot, huh?" a Bro shall remain silent, because in this situation, he's the only one who should be baiting.
Article 22: There is no law that prohibits a woman from being a Bro.
Article 23 When flipping through TV channals with his Bros, a Bro is not allowed to skip past a program featuring boobs. This includes but is not limited to, exercise shows, womens athletics, and on some occasions surgery programs.
Article 24: When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may poition the brim at either 12 or 6 o'clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers and the handicapped.
Article 25: A Bro doesnt let another Bro get a tattoo, particularly a tattoo of a girls name.
Article 26: Unless he has children, a Bro shall not wear his cell phone on a belt clip.
Article 27: A Bro never removes his shirt in front of other Bros, unless at a resort pool or the beach
Article 28: A Bro will, in a timely manner, alert his Bro to the existence of a girl fight
Article 29: If two Bros decide to catch a movie together, they may not attend a screening that begins after 4:40pm. Also despite the cost savings, they shall not split a tub of popcorn, choosing instead to procure individual bags.
Article 30: A Bro doesn't comparison shop.
Article 31: When on the prowl, a Bro hits on the hottest chick first because you just never know
Article 32: A Bro doesnt allow another Bro to get married until hes at least thirty
Article 33 When in a public restroom, a Bro (1) stares straight ahead when using the urinal; (2) makes the obligatory comment, "What is this, a chicks' restroom?" if there are more than two dudes waiting to pee; and (3) attempts to shoot his used paper towel into the trash can like a basketball...rebounding is optional.
Article 34: Bros cannot make eye-contact during a Devil's Threeway.
Article 35: A Bro never rents a chick flick
Article 36 DD: When questioned in the company of women, a Bro always decries fake breasts.
Article 37: A Bro is under no obligation to open a door for anyone. If women insist on having their own professional basketball league, then they can open their own doors. Honestly they're not that heavy
Article 38: Even in a fight to the death a Bro never punches another Bro in the groin. When a Bro gets a chicks number, he waits at least ninety-six hours before calling her.
Article 40: Should a Bro become stricken with engagement, his Bros shall stage an intervention and attempt to heal him. This is more commonly known as "a bachelor party."
Article 41: A Bro never cries (Exceptions- Watching Field of Dreams, ET or a sports legend right (only first time he retires))
Article 42: Upon greeting another Bro, a Bro may engage in a high five, fist bump, or a Bro hug, but never a full embrace.
Article 43: A Bro loves his country, unless that country isn't America.
Article 44: A Bro never applies sunscreen to another Bro
Article 45: A Bro never wears jeans to a strip club
Article 46: If a Bro is seated next to some dude who's stuck in the middle seat on an airplane, he shall yield him all of their shared armrest, unlesss the dude has (a) teken his shoes off, (b) is snoring, (c) makes the Bro get up more than once to use the lavatory, or (d) purchased headphones after they announced the in-flight movie is 27 Dresses. See Article 35.
Article 47: A Bro never wears pink. Not even in Europe
Article 48: A Bro never publicly reveals how many chicks he's banged.
Article 49: When asked, "Do you need some help?" a Bro shall automatically respond, "I gotit," whether or not he's actually got it.
Article 50: If a Bro should accidentally strike another Bro's undercarriage with his arm while walking, both Bros silently agree to continue on as if it never happened.
Article 51: A Bro checks out another Bro's blind date and reports back with a thumbs-up or thumbs-down
Article 52: A Bro is not required to remember another Bros birthday, though a phone call every not and again probably wouldn't kill him
Article 53: Even in a drought, a Bro flushes twice
Article 54: A Bro is required to go out with his Bros on St. Paddy's Day and other official Bro hilidays, including Halloween, New Year's Eve, and Desperation Day (February 13th)
Article 55: Even in an emergency that requires a tourniquet, a Bro never borrows from or lends clothes to another Bro.
Article 56: A Bro is required to alert another Bro if the Bro/chick Ration at a party falls below 1:1. However, to avoid Broflation, a Bro is only allowed to alert one Bro. Further, a Bro may not speculate on the anticipated Bro/Chick Ratio of a party or venue without first disclosing the present-time observed ratio.
Article 57: A Bro never reveals the score of a sporting event to another Bro unless that Bro has thrice confirmed he wants to hear it.
Article 58: A Bro doesn't grow a mustache (Exception Tom Selleck)
Article 59: A Bro must always post bail for another Bro, unless it's out of state or, like, crazy expensive (Crazy expensive bail >(years you've been bros) x $100)
Article 60: A Bro shall honor they father and mother, for they were once Bro and chick. However, a Bro never thinks of them in that capacity.
Article 61: If a Bro for whatever reason becomes aware of another Bro's anniversary with a chick, he shall endeavor to make that information available to his Bro, regardless of whether he thinks his Bro already knows.
Article 62: In the event that two Bros lock on to the same target, the Bro who calls dibs first has dibs. If both call dibs at the same time, the Bro who counts aloud to ten the fastest has dibs. If both arrive at the number ten at the same time, the Bro who bought the last round of drinks has dibs. If they haven't purchased drinks yet, the taller of the two Bros has dibs. If they're the same height, the Bro with the longer dry spell has dibs. Should the dry spells be of equal length, a game of discreet Broshambo* shall determine dibs, provided the chick is still there. *Rock, paper, scissors for Bros.
Article 63: A Bro will make any and all efforts to provide his Bro with protection
Article 64: A Bro must provide his Bro with a ticket to an event if said event involves the latter Bro's favourite sports team in a playoff scenario
Article 65: A Bro must always reciprocate a round of drinks amoung Bros.
Article 66: If a Bro suffers pain due to the permanent dissolution of a relationship with a lady friend, a Bro shall offer nothing more than a 'that sucks, man' and copious quantities of beer. A Bro will also refrain from pejorative commentary - desered or not - regarding said lady friend for a period of three months, when the requisite BACKSLIDE WINDOW has closed.
Article 67: Should a Bro pick up a guitar at a party and commence playing, another Bro shall point out that he is a tool.
Article 68: If a Bro be on hot streak, another Bro will do everything possible to ensure its longevity, even if that includes jeopardizing his own records, the missing of work, or, if necessary, generating a realistic fear that the end of the world is imminent. (Dry spell trumps hot streak)
Article 69: Duh.
Article 70: A Bro will drive another Bro to the airport or pick him up, but never both for the same trip. He is not expected to be on time, help with luggage, or inquire about his Bro's trip or general well-being.
Article 71: As a courtesy to Bros the world over, a Bro never brings more than two other Bros to a party.
Article 72: A Bro never spell-checks.
Article 73: When a group of Bros are in a restaurant, each shall engage in the time-honored ritual of jockeying to pay the bill, regardless of affordability. When the group ultimately decides to divide the check, each Bro shall act upset rather that enormously relieved.
Article 74: At a red light, a Bro inches as close as possible to the rear bumper of the car infront of him, and then immediately honks his horn when the light turns green. That way if another Bro is several cars behind, he'll have a better chance of making it through the intersection before the light turns red again.
Article 75: A Bro automatically enhances another Bro's job description when introducing him to a chick.
Article 76: If a Bro is on the phone with a chick while in front of his Bros and, for whatever reason, desires to say "I love you" he shall first excuse himself from the room or employ a subsonic barry white-esque tone
Article 77: Bros don't cuddle
Article 78: A Bro shall never rack jack his wingman
Article 79: At a wedding, Bros shall reluctantly trudge out for the garter toss and feign interest for the benefit of the chicks present. Whichever Bro gets stuck with the garter shall lightheartedly pretend he's not horrified at the thought of being the next one to drop before scurrying to the bar for a very stiff drink and/or shots.
Article 80: A bro shall make every effort to aid another Bro in riding the tricycle, short of completing the tricycle himself.
Article 81: A Bro leaves the toilet seat up for his Bros
Article 82: If two Bros get into a heated argument over something and one says something out of line, the other shall not expect him to take it back or apologise to make amends. That's inhuman.
Article 83: A Bro shall, at all costs, honor the Platinum Rule: Never, ever, ever, ever " love" thy neighbor. In particular, a Bro shall never mix it up romantically with a co-worker.
Article 84: Bro shall stop whatever he's doing and watch Die Hard if it's on TV.
Article 85: If a Bro buys a new car, he is required to pop the hood when showing it off to his Bros.
Article 86: When a Bro meets a chick he shall endeavor to find out where she fits on the Hot/Crazy Scale before pursuing her.
Article 87: A Bro never questions another Bro's stated golf score, maximum bench press, or height. He can however, ask the Bro to prove it, traditionally in the form of a wager.
Article 88: If a Bro, for whatever reason must drive another Bro's car, he shall not adjust the preprogrammed radio stations, the mirrors, or the seat position, even if this last requirement results in the Bro trying to drive the vehicle as a giant praying mantis would.
Article 89: A Bro shall always say yes in support of a Bro
Article 90: A Bro shows up at another Bro's party with at least one more unit of alcohol than he plans to drink. So if a Bro plans on chugging a six pack, he shall bring a six pack plus at least one can of beer. If the party sucks and/or there are too many dudes, the Bro is entitled to leave with his alcohol, though etiquette dictates he should wait until nobody is looking.
Article 91: If a group of Bros suspect that their Bro is trying to give himself a nickname, they shall rally to call him by an adjacent yet more demeaning nickname
Article 92: A Bro keeps his booty calls at a safe distance
Article 93: Bros don't speak French to one another
Article 94: If a Bro is in the bathroom and runs out of toilet paper, another Bro may toss him a new roll, but at no point may their hands touch or the door open more than 30 degrees
Article 95: A Bro shall alert another Bro to the presence of a chesty woman regardless of whether or not he knows the Bro. Such alerts may not be administered verbally. (The shoes tap, The eye redirect, The swift shin kick *D cups and up only, please*)
Article 96: Bros shall go camping once a year, or at least attempt to start a fire
Article 97: Where a Bro went to college is going to kick his Bro's college's ass all over the field this weekend
Article 98: A Bro never lies to his Bros about the hotness of chicks at a given social venue or event
Article 99: A Bro never asks for directions when lost
Exception: A Bro may ask for directions for a hot chick who seems to know the area
Exception: A Bro may ask for directions from a hot chick even if she also appears lost
Exception: A Bro may ask for directions from a hot chick even if he is not lost at all.
Article 100: When pulling up to a stoplight, a Bro lowers his window so that all might enjoy his music selection.
Corollary: If there happens to be a hot chick driving the car next to the Bro, the Bro shall pull his sunglasses down to get a better look. If he's not wearing his sunglasses, he will first put them on, then pull them down to get a better look.
Article 101: If a Bro asks another Bro to keep a secret, he shall take that secret to his grave* This is what makes them Bros, not chicks
*And beyond if the Bro discovers there is indeed life after death.
Article 102: A Bro shall take great care in selecting and training his wingman.
Article 103: A Bro never wears socks with sandals. He commits to one cohesive footgrear plan and sticks with it.
Article 104: The mom of a Bro is always off-limits. But the stepmom of a Bro is fair game if she initiates and /or is wearing at least one article of leopard print clothing...provided she looks good in it...but not if she smokes menthol cigarettes
Article 105: If a Bro is not invited to another Bro's wedding, he doesn't make a big deal out of it, even if, let's face it, he was kind of responsible for setting up the couple and had already picked out the perfect wedding gift and everything. Its cool. No big whoop.
Article 106: Given an option on quantity when ordering a beer with his Bros, a Bro always selects the largest size available or shall never hear the end of it that night
Article 107: A Bro never leaves another Bro hanging
Article 108: If a Bro forgets a guy's name he may call him "brah","dude", or "man" but never "Bro"
Article 109: When Bros attend a sporting event and see themselves on the JumboTron, they shall purse their lips and flex their biceps while informing the crowd that their team is number one, despite any objective rankings to the contrary.
Article 110: If a Bro is hitting it off with a chick, his Bro shall do anything within his means to ensure the desired outcome
Article 111: If a Bro discovers another Bro has forgotten to sign out of his email the Bro will sign out for him, but only after first sending a few angry emails to random contacts and then deleting all sent messages.
Article 112: A Bro doesnt sing along to music in a bar.
Exception: A Bro may participate in karaoke
Exception to exception: No chick songs
Article 113: A Bro abides by the accepted age-difference formula when pursuing a young chick
Acceptable age difference formula
Chick's age = Guy's age divided by 2, + 7
(Shall add chart shortly)
Article 114: If a Bro must crash on his Bro's couch for an extended period of time, he shall offer to split the cost of toilet paper and the cable bill if said period exceeds two weeks. If he stays longer than a month, he shall offer to contribute some rent. If he stays longer than two months, he shall sheam clean the couch or have it incinerated, whichever is more applicable
Article 115: A "clothing optional" beach doesn't really mean "clothing optional" for Bros
Article 116: A Bro shall not kill another Bro or a Bros chances to score with a chick
Article 117: A Bro never willingly relinquishes possession of a remote control. If another Bro desires a channel change, he may verbally request one or engage in the fools errand of getting up to manually change the channel
Article 118: When a Bro is with his Bros he is not a vegetarian
Article 119: When three Bros must share the backseat of a car, it is unacceptable for any Bro to put his arm around another Bro to increase space. Likewise, it is unacceptable for two Bros to share a motorcycle, unless said motorcycle is equipped with a sidecar...a Brotorcycle
Article 120: A Bro always calls another Bro by his last name
Article 121: Even if he's never skied before, a Bro doesn't trifle with the bunny slope.
Article 122: A Bro is always psyched. Always.
Article 123: Two Bros shall maintain at least a three-foot radius between them while dancing on the same floor, even when reenacting the knife fight from "Beat It" which, I guess, two Bros shouldn't do anyway, or at least not very often.
Article 124: If a Bro should shoot an air ball, strike out while playing softball, or throw a gutter ball while Bowling, he is required to make some sort of excuse for himself.
Article 125: If a Bro is driving ahead of another Bro in a Bro TRain, he is required to attempt to lose him in traffic as a funny joke.
Article 126: In a scenario where two or more Bros are watching entertainment of the adult variety, one Bro is forbidden from intentionally or unintentionally touching another Bro in ANY capacity. This may include but is not limited to: the high five, the fist bump or the confratulary gluteal pat. Winking is also kind of a no-no.
Article 127: A Bro will always help another Bro reconstruct the events from the previous night, unless those events entail hooking up with an ugly chick or the Bro repeatedly saying "I love you, man" to all his Bros.
Article 128: A Bro never wears two articles of clothing at the same time that bear the same school name, vacation destination or sports team. Even in a laundry emergency, its preferred that a Bro go out half naked rather than violate this code...half naked from the waist up, naturally.
Article 129: If a Bro lends another Bro a DVD, video game, or piece of laawn machinery, he shall not expect to ever get it back, unless his Bro happens to die and bequeath it back to him.
Article 130: If a Bro learns another Bro has been in a traffic accident, he must first ask what type of car he collided with and whether it got totaled before asking if his Bro is okay.
Article 131: While a Bro is not expected to know exactly how to change a tire, he is required to at least drag out the jack and stare at the flat for a while. If he needs to consult the car's ownership manual to locate the jack, he shall do so from inside the car, where he is not visible to passersby and where he can discreetly call a tow truck, after which it is recommended that he hide the jack by the side of the road so he'll have a legitimate excuse when the tow truck arrives.
Article 132: If a Bro decides to let all of his Bros down and get married, he is required to invite them to the wedding, even if this directly violates the wishes of his fiancée and results in a "no sex" penalty or whatever lame domestic punishment couples might employ
Article 133: A Bro only claims a fart after first accusing at least one other Bro.
Article 134: A Bro is entitled to use a woman as his wingman
Article 135: If a scenario arises in which a Bro has promised two of his Bros permanent shotgun, one of the following shall determine the copitot: (1) foot race to the car, (2) silent auction or in the case of a road trip exceeding 450 miles, (3) a no-holds-barred cage match to the death.
Article 136: When interrogated by a girlfriend about a bachelor party, a Bro shall offer nothing more than an uninterested "It was okay"
Article 137: When hosting, a Bro orders enough pizza for all his Bros
Article 138: A real Bro doesn't laugh when a guy gets hit in the groin.
Exception: Unless he doesn't know the guy.
Article 139: Regardless of veracity, a Bro never admits familiarity with a Broadway show or musical, despite the fact that, yes, "Broadway" begins with "Bro"
Article 140: A Bro reserves the right to simply walk away during the first five minutes of a date. (Lemon Law)
Article 141: A Bro can only get a manicure if (a) he's trying to sleep with the hot Asian woman performing the manicure, or (b) its been longer than a month since his last manicure. Its called the Bro Code, not the slob Code.
Article 142: A Bro shall seek no revenge if he passes out around his Bros and wakes up to find marker all over his face.
Article 143: When executing a high five a bRo is forbidden from intertwining fingers of grasping his Bro's hand
Article 144: It is unacceptable for two Bros to share a hotel bed without first exhausting all couch, cot, and pillows-on-floor combinations. If it's still unavoidable, they shall prevent any incidental spoonage by arm wresting to determine who sleeps under the covers. Once decided each Bro shall don as many lower layers as possible before silently fist bumping the other good night.
Article 145: A Bro is never offended if another Bro fails to return a phone call, text or email in a timely fashion
Article 146: A Bro refrains from using too much detain when relating sexual exploits to his Bros
Article 147: If a Bro sees another Bro get into a fight, he immediately has his Bro's back
Exception: If his Bro has picked a fight with a scary looking guy
Exception: If this is the third fight (or more) his Bro has gotten into that week)
Exception: If the Bro has a note from a physician excusing him from having anybody's back
Article 148: A Bro doesnt listen to chick music...in front of other Bros. When alone, a Bro may listen to, say, a Sarah McLachlan album or two, but only to gain valuable insights into the female psyches, not because he finds her melodies tragically haunting yet curiously uplifting at the same time.
Article 149: A Bro pretends to understand and enjoy cigars
Article 150: No sex with your Bro's ex